MargOH!’s Top 12 ½ Hollywood Hunks of All Time

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MargOH!’s Top 12.5

Hey kids I’m back with my second Top 12.5. This one is going to be hot because it’s all about men. Now kids don’t be shy and say hi. Let me know your favorites. I feel in a democracy we should share our every thought including sexual fantasies. So who do you want to do?

MargOH!’s Top 12 ½ Hollywood Hunks of All Time

Now before I present my official list I want everyone to know there ain’t gonna be no Tom Cruise (crazy isn’t cute) or Brad Pitt ( god knows where that’s been). There isn’t going to be any action stars like Arnold (gross) or Stallone (AKA frying pan in the face). Most of all there will be no Mel Gibson ( lunatic isn’t lush)…

So here we go…These are the men that melt my butter

Paul Rudd

Cute, cuddly and OH! what a smile! My all time favorite sex pot is Mister Rudd. Whether it was his bashful charm in “Clueless” or his scruffy chunky sexy in “My Idiot Brother” I adore him.  He’s timeless and charming with a twist of sincerity that I can’t get enough of…My Gayiance MAN-ee said he’d even give me a free pass to get passionate with Paul. Paul darling are you listening? MargOH! is calling

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Christopher Atkins

I don’t know how many times I wanted to drown Brooke Shields and take her place when I watched The Blue Lagoon. The curly hair, the loin cloth, the light dancing voice and OH! those rosy cheeks. What a dream! Now he looks like he has sucked on a few exhaust pipes but there was that moment in time when he was the hottest thing around. How I wanted to swim in his blue lagoon. Hell I would have settled for a murky swimming pool for a piece of that cake…

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 Gene Kelly

Dance I said, dance and boy did Gene Kelly dance! He danced in the rain, he danced in Paris, he danced as a pirate on a boat and he even danced in New York. I often think he gets overlooked as a hottie but he had it all.  Gorgeous hair, smile, and for his time a fantastic body. He even aged gracefully and was still a looker in Xanadu…

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 Keanu Reeves

Just the way I like em! Hot, sexy and dumb as a stump! Just kidding! No I’m not! MargOH! does love a mindless challenge. That deep voice and peering eyes made me run out to see “Bill and Ted” and even “Speed” revved my engines. I loved his bondage look in “The Matrix” and hoped his speedo would fall off in “Point Break”. Let’s face it kids he can’t act but who cares when you are looking at that meat on the screen.

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Rock Hudson

I mean anyone with a name like Rock ought be attractive. I have to say that Mr. Hudson was gorgeous and kids…guess what? He is the only one on this list that I’ve slept with, you know did the nasty. You see I had just filmed “Common Law Cabin” and Russ Meyer brought me to a party at Rocks. In a way I think a party at Rocks house was like a Hollywood initiation. It was really a big sex party without ugly people. Everyone was gorgeous and naked. Russ filled me up with expensive champagne and brought me to Rocks room which was reserved for special guests. The next thing I know I was taking it doggie style with Rock slapping me on the ass telling me to take it like a man…I’m all for rough sex but I like a little foreplay…We live and learn don’t we girls?

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 Johnny Depp

Now, now I know! Another dark haired man? I can’t help it. I think I like Johnny because he is a master of disguise. It’s not that he’s too sexy or too good looking. He is just in that irresistible range…mysterious…Plus I think he’d also make for a gorgeous woman…I see many shades of femininity and masculinity crossing paths in Johnny’s eyes. I guess I’m smitten with the Bi in me for Johnny.

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Ryan O’Neal

After watching his reality show with daughter Tatum I thought this man is absolutely insane, a total tool and completely unwilling to see any of his own faults. I guess when you were that incredibly attractive it must be hard to grow old. I bet there is a desire to roll around in the grass with Ally McGraw one more time or punch Barbra in the face again. He also landed one of the most gorgeous women who ever lived Farrah Fawcett and obviously loved her but lost her. So much so that he ruined his children’s lives and this has made him ugly…This choice is another one moment in time pick when you cannot deny how handsome Ryan O’Neal was.

On another note Tatum O’Neal would be on my most beautiful list of ladies…If I were a girl I’d wanna look just like her…OH! wait I am a girl…damn it!!!!!!!!!

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Marlon Brando

I’ve got one thing to say “Handsome”. I’ve got one wish! I wish he’d turned down that extra donut at the kraft foods services table while making his movies…yikes!

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Ian Somerhalder

Who? You know the guy that played Boone on Lost and is now on Vampire Diaries. He was also on Smallville. He is a television actor that lights up that little box. I can’t discriminate and there are a few other TV guys like Jesse Metcalf, Daniel Sunjata, Blair Underwood and Eric Maibus that are surely Hollywood hunks of the little screen. It’s all about the eyes for Ian and they would reflect so gorgeously against my martini’s. He is the perfect sidecar to any ladies…or mans drink for that matter…

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 Montgomery Clift

A man after my own heart…A bit of a drinker, Bi-sexual and not willing to conform to what or how society feels you should be. I like a man who goes his own way and Monty Clift was hell bent on doing that and unfortunately paid the price. Montgomery Clift was one of the best actors of all time with five academy award nominations including one for “A Place in the Sun” and “From Here to Eternity”. Elizabeth Taylor was quoted saying “Monty would have been the biggest star in the world if he did more movies”. He was a gorgeous man and died way too young.

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Ashton Kutcher

There is tall, dark and handsome but then there is also tall, thin and handsome. I’ve just had a thing for this man ever since “That 70’s show”. I think he was a way better sweat hog than John Travolta. Cute, quirky and uncoordinated can be sexy in my book. It’s not his fault he was snatched up by a pretentious cougar named Demi Moore. Ashton we could have been magic…

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Colin Farrell

Dirty, filthy, sexy and kids that video…He made straight celebrity sex tapes worth watching over and over and over and over again. Not that I own it or anything or have it downloaded to my computer as my home page or anything…It’s not all about the sex tape because Colin is a damn good actor. I would personally audition him for his next role in my future sex tape. Aptly titled “MargOH! does Hollywood”…

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Now for my ½ choice of MargOH!’s top 12 ½

Danny DeVito

The only thing sexy about Danny DeVito is that he is married to the sassy and fabulous Rhea Perlman. I gotta secret that Rhea told me when I did a role on Cheers as bar hag # 6. I promised never to tell but after all these years I just have to. Danny DeVito is hung almost as tall as he is and makes Rhea curl her toes several times in a night…Stick that in your pipe and smoke it MargOH!’s Top 12…

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I’m not the only one hot for the Hollywood elite. My facebook friends are all over the sexy…

Former Beauty Queen, Dancer and now Tarot Reader to the Stars Jennifer “Swampwitch” Johnson said Clark Gable makes her see a very sexy past life experience. Though when she puts out her spread nowadays she see’s nothing but the quirky and cute John Cusack in her cards…

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My artist pals, who are the world’s sexiest couple Sebastian Lava and Kobe Leah go gaga over different guys. Sebastian gets a rise out of Warhol Superstar Joe Dallesandro while Kobe goes classic with the one and only James Dean. I guess we know what they’re doing after a nightcap…

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TV personality, actor and Hollywood hunk himself, Scott Nevins (from truTV’s hit show “The Smoking Gun Presents”)
can’t get over how sexy Rob Lowe still is after all these years. I have to agree with Mr. Nevins on this one. Mr. Lowe has not lost one ounce of
gorgeous since he wowed us as Sodapop in the “Outsiders”. I gotta tell ya I wouldn’t mind being in a Nevins/Lowe
sandwich…OH! MargOH! stop…

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Drag star Charity Charles says no one does it better than Bond…James Bond…Sean Connery of course. I bet I know what Charity wants to do with her Goldfinger after watching the original Bond do his stuff…

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Thomas Bistritz (Demanda Dahling) of Gay Socialites and just about anything fun and happening in the big apple also has a hankering for the rebel in the red jacket James Dean. He adds that he prefers this hunk after the accident…hmmm? Whatever floats your boat…I guess hot and sexy on a slab works too…

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Now I’m all hot and steamy after writing this and looking at all these pictures. My press on’s even came loose. Luckily I still have Christopher Atkins number in my rolodex. I’m all for another remake of the Blue Lagoon in my bathtub…

See ya at the party kids!!

Kisses, MargOH!


  1. Jennifer Johnson

    October 21, 2011 at 1:13 PM

    I love MargOH’s blogs .. always entertaining and fascinating.. She has such a way with words.

  2. MargOH!

    October 22, 2011 at 4:49 PM

    Thanks Jen and Thanks for sharing Your favorites and can’t wait to see you in New York

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